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The 5 Most Dangerous Jobs In America

On the list of most dangerous jobs.


The 5 Most Dangerous Jobs In America
1. Police Officer
(Job was always dangerous but has now made it to the top of the list
as criminal behavior, terrorism, and anarchy are the new norm for some people.)

2. Preacher Wife
(Being the wife of a preacher has a high mortality rate, an unusual number of
preacher wives die under mysterious circumstances, disappear, or are 
murdered. Women: think twice before you marry that smooth talking preacher.
When he gets a jealous woman on the side, known as a *THOT, your days are numbered. 
Start sleeping with a gun.)

3. Dog Ball Checker
(Indiana has a dog ball tax, 2.00 for female dogs and 4.00 for male dogs, paid yearly.
If you lie and get caught, you can be charged with perjury for not claiming
dogs or lying about gender. Someone has to check dog balls in every county. Since dogs
don't like strangers checking their balls without a fight, this is a very
dangerous job. There have been 17 dog ball checkers disabled in 2015.)

4. Tickling Buttholes
(This dangerous job can also lead to arrest, see above, and can be deadly. The guy in 
the picture claims he was hired to tickle buttholes so it has been added to the 
list. According to records 8 out of 10 home invading butthole ticklers have been 
shot or beaten to death. No info on who would hire a butthole tickler.)

5. Commercial Fisherman
(Used to be #1 but gradually replaced by others. Still is considered to be
very dangerous job with high injury and mortality rate. When you have 
a job where one slip could put you on the menu, it's never good.)


(There are other dangerous jobs like Military Grunt, Coal Miner, Driving Instructor,
school teacher in a gun free zone, intern for a politician, carnival sawdust spreader, but for the current time they are rated down on the list.) 

* THOT Thirsty Ho Over There


Comments

  1. Brilliant! And oh so true...I wasn't aware of the butt-hole tickler, but from now on I will redouble my vigilance as I keep an eye out on the ever-increasing list of maladies we seem to be faced with every day...thanks for the THOT!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There seems to be a rash of butthole ticklers down in the Aurora area. Don't fall asleep there without heavy clothes on.

      Delete

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